soooooooooo...been jobless for about 4 months now. and i have been using that time to try to sort ME out and all the things wrong with me. well actually ok, that couldn't start until last month, after i got back into the system for getting meds and stuff.

i see myself heading for one of those loveless people at the moment. i think i like the idea where i wouldn't talk and be even more of a introvert. i mean damn, i only get to be around the people in my house as it is, and i talk very infrequently to a small handful of people in the outside world through text.

i don't really ever got out and hang out with anyone. it's weird. but maybe i should just stay that way, it could be safer.

i think and dream about repainting my honda, and how i'd airbrush it and all without having any means or money to actually do it. and i think about replacing the outside moldings that are cracked from it sitting out in the Texas sun. i found a great cd player for it that fixes a lot of problems i have with the current one, and it made me happy, and well...still no means or money for it. i think about getting the next job and paying off the 1,078 that i owe to the Texas health system. and the dr bills i had while i was there.





heh life can kinda suck when you have disorders. it seems to put everything else on hold all the time.